Up From The Dead

I could probably have done what I wanted to do, without asking for permission, and no one would have been the wiser. But I asked. It was a perfectly reasonable request, requiring nothing at all from anyone—except permission. No harm to anyone … you know, that kind of request. I asked, and I was told no, because although my request was reasonable, the person I was asking was not.

This, unfortunately, was not one of those easy situations where all that would be necessary was a little further explanation … oh, no. This was a stubborn, unreasonable no that couldn’t and wouldn’t be changed, I knew.

I don’t know what your first response to something like that would be, but mine was anger. Unreasonable, stupid things, rules, and decisions have a tendency to make me angry (and I had a double dose of that one day last week, so I know the Lord is working on it!) because I don’t think anyone ought to make unreasonable or stupid rules and decisions. My second reaction was a smidgen of hurt, and my third reaction was a form of anger that came with tears … which, I have to admit, were a result of my wishes and desires having been thwarted. I know, I should be more mature than this … but I want what I want, and sometimes when I don’t get it, I have just a wee bit of a tantrum.

This one, fortunately, really was a wee one.

Because … I remembered my little mantra: “Jesus, you are lord of this!” That helped. Step one in the right direction. Then I looked myself in the eye, in the mirror, and said, “Charissa, do you really believe that God can raise this from the dead?” (In other words, change the mind of the decision-maker.) I swallowed hard, but I do believe it. Moreover, I realized I had to forgive the unreasonable person, because Jesus’ lordship means that this guy made this decision because God has something bigger in mind. Like, maybe, a change of mind.

Now, you might consider that unreasonable of me, on the grounds of, why do I believe that what I want to do is right, and that therefore God would change this guy’s mind. Good point, but I knew. Or, at least, I was pretty well convinced.

My feelings weren’t quite with me yet, but I was on the right track. However, I was contemplating ways and means of doing what I wanted in such a way that I didn’t need this unreasonable man’s permission. And then I got zapped.

“There is nothing I won’t do for you if you’ll wait for Me.”

Now, I know God said this specifically to me, but the promise is there for all, with the “delight yourself in the Lord” bit and the “seek first the kingdom” bit. And I knew God would do it for me, if I would wait for him.

Period.

So … I will wait.

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