Fully Engaged

I can’t recall where I heard or read the phrase "fully engaged," but I thought of it this morning, and I know the Lord likes it. In fact, the writer of Hebrews quotes the Lord as saying that if the righteous—who lives by faith—draws back, the Lord’s soul has no pleasure in him. Faith is all about being fully engaged, and without fully engaged faith, we cannot please the Lord. Frankly, why mess with anything if the Lord isn’t taking pleasure in me?

When I use the phrase "fully engaged," it is possible that some of you immediately know what I mean, but perhaps others don’t, so I’ll tell you what brought this to mind.

It’s no secret that a husband has been a matter of discussion between me and the Lord for some time. One day rolls into the next, and here I am, still alone. Don’t kid yourself into thinking my faith never waivers. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever have what I’ve asked for, and I try to talk myself into just being happy the way I am. After indulging in depression for whatever length of time, I invariably remember that I can’t be happy without what He has promised me, but when I’m living by faith, I can be happy until I’ve received what He’s promised.

So the other day, I had a lonely spell, and after a fit of tears, I thought to ask myself if I’d be filled with unqualified happiness if Mr. Right popped the question and wanted to tie the knot tomorrow. Uhm, no. My bed is big enough for two, and my garage has room for another car, but the rest of my house is pretty well filled with my stuff, and the prospect of being crunched for space … well, maybe I’m not quite lonely enough to be interested in tolerating being crowded. Does that mean I have to learn to be happy alone? Of course not! The very next morning after the Lord had convinced me that He had already given me what I’d asked for, He gave me a plan for the perfect addition for my house, to make room for the man. Can I afford it today? No. Of course not. If I could afford it today, why would I need faith?

So I plan to be ready, plans fully developed, to tear down my deck and begin laying a foundation in October, after my garden is finished and my bluebirds have migrated. Meanwhile, my beets are being destroyed by some little critter and my beans are being eaten by bugs. So do I give up on my garden, or do I put my foot down and insist that the Lord protect my garden, because it’s mine, and He is responsible for everything that belongs to me?

You can think what you like, but I know that if I’m not fully engaged, I’d be just as well off being dead.

And that’s a fact.

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