Charm Is Deceitful

A conversation a couple hours ago triggered my memories of a woman I met only once, more than five years ago. She was (and still is) the controller of a company, and her assistant had simply walked off the job several months before, and they were considering hiring a replacement. I was probably almost qualified for the job, and at the time was looking for some supplemental income, so I applied and interviewed.

It was a terrible interview, in part because I didn’t have a decent wardrobe and was still a very raw and green girl, almost-thirty-years-old notwithstanding; in part because this woman was pretty intimidating. Her hair was just so, her make-up was just so, her clothes were just so, and her manners were just so. How could anyone live up to that level of perfection? Most particularly, how could I live up to that level of perfection?

The problem was that all that perfection—all the outward trappings and mannerisms and personality that we may refer to as being "charming"—was deceptive. She told me she would call me, and she never did. That may seem like no big deal, but I’ve since learned that such things are very much normal with her. Probably no older than I am, she has two children from two now-broken marriages; her promises perpetually outweigh her follow-through; and her inabilities as a manager have cost her company thousands of dollars over the years in things like late-filing penalties and lost opportunities.

Charm is deceptive.

How sad it is, then, that most people are sucked in by charm to such a degree that they expend all their energies attempting to build a façade that will fool those around them. How few Christian girls really want to be known as "a woman who fears the Lord," compared to the number whose entire focus is on becoming beautiful (empty) or learning to be charming (deceitful)?

I’m not suggesting that either beauty or charm is bad. My point is that they are frequently not authentic. Like the charming salesman who came last week: all the charm was there, and yet he managed to make me feel — bad. The real person always shows up before long. If the real thing is acrid, others will walk away with a bitter taste, regardless of how charming we’ve learned to be. The real thing cannot be hidden.

The same, however, is true of the woman who fears the Lord. When the reality is loving God and wanting to please Him, that will show up soon, too. The surface may not be polished to a shine, but the heart will show through eventually. She’s the one who will be praised in the end, after the façade of charm has worn off the charmers. She won’t be afraid to reap what she’s sown, because what she’s sown came from a heart of love that was true.

Let’s let the Lord change the inside, instead of working to change the outside ourselves.

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