The Heart of a Child

One of the many controversial subjects over the past few years is what is commonly known as "spanking." Perhaps if spanking parents were universally successful, there wouldn't be a controversy. Unfortunately, many spanking parents have lousy methods, and just as many seem to have lousy motives.

I believe that the most successful parents have, as their model, God. That means that in order to be a successful parent, you must, for starters, know God. How can you be a good mimic of someone you don't know? You may sometimes be successful in copying his behavior, but if you don't know his motivation, you may be guilty of doing the right thing at the ridiculously wrong moment.

Throughout the history of Israel, we can see God's heart as He spoke through the prophets, and the cry that prevails is, "You have turned away from me. Turn back to me!" He didn't reprove David (as we would have) for dancing immodestly. Instead He condemned proper behavior when it was enacted by those whose "hearts are far from Me." It wasn't Israel's behavior that concerned Him; it was their heart.

(We tend to confuse heart with behavior in much the same way we confuse intelligence with knowledge. An intelligent person can do the wrong thing through ignorance, just as a person whose heart is right can do the wrong thing through ignorance. Right behavior can no more take the place of a right heart, however, than knowledge can take the place of intelligence.)

The logical conclusion, then, is that when God uses His version of the rod, His primary purpose is not to modify behavior, but to turn the heart. If, then, the rod of . sickness, let's say . comes into my life, its primary purpose is to turn my heart to God. No wonder so many of our "saviors"-doctors, lawyers, bankers, politicians-are so terribly unsuccessful! God would save us by His own hand, but most of us never get around to turning our hearts to Him.

Just as God's purpose in "spanking" is to turn our hearts to Him, so our purpose in spanking our children should be-at least, if we want to be successful parents. Sadly, many parents do not have their hearts turned to their children. They spank when the child makes them mad, gets on their last nerve, or embarrasses them. Even if they managed to accidentally turn their child's heart, the child would only be frustrated to find himself facing the brick wall of the parent's heart.

The rod, you see, is not a way to enforce the superior strength and knowledge of someone who is bigger, stronger, and wiser. Parents and bullies should have nothing in common.

It doesn't take a rocket scientist, however, to figure out that gifts and soft words aren't the only things required to turn the heart of a child. Your two-year-old child and God's fifty-year-old child have a lot in common.

Sometimes each of them needs the rod.

If this message has been forwarded to you, and you would like to be added to Charissa’s mailing list please send your request to info@charissaschalk.com. Thank you.